Evangelical and Anglican? The journey in sharper focus.

Having become aware that I needed to actually make some decisions and answer some tough questions before I considered myself to be a Christian, I found that starting off in a Baptist Church was a bit of a shock to the system. You see, I had just assumed that being English (or perhaps even 'British') was enough to confer the tile 'Christian' upon me. Christian was what I was as a birthright and there was nothing else required outside that.

So in a Baptist Church in Marlow, Buckinghamshire, I found myself struggling with the issues of personal sin and salvation. I have to be honest and admit that what brought me in to church was actually a great friend, James Osbourne, and a host of really gorgeous women. These all coalesced into a young people's weekend and it was there, having failed to pull any of the women, that God (with the help of a bloke called Gordon Bailey) effectively pulled me instead.

My time as a Bapper was happy and I learned much. I learned about personal sin, believer's baptism (which rendered infant baptism invalid and without any merit of efficacy) and the importance of reading my Bible and having 'Quiet times'.

I moved away and ended up incollege and there, Navigators (who read their Bibles and memorised verses all day) and reformed evangelical types taught me that if I couldn't learn the Bible I was doomed and then, more confusingly, taught me that even if I could learn the Bible I might still be doomed anyway because it was all about predestination and selection anyway. Confused - you'd better believe it!

Sex outside of marriage was a total 'no no'. The homosexuality issue was never discussed, alcohol and drugs were a non-issue and housegroups, church and discipline were in abundance everywhere (even in the C of E). Halcyon days indeed!

A move into the Pentecostal wing confirmed that extra-marital relations were verboten, along with these went pre-marital sex, homosexuality, alcohol, drugs and anything that could be construed as having the 'appearance of evil'. I was taught that Anglicans were the heathen mentioned in the Bible and that their services consisted of the vain repetitions and babblings of the unsaved. Again I was convinced that infant baptism was invalid and presented a futile, inclusive, practice which (in the light of believer's baptism) had nothing to commend it. The sneers that any mention of 'sprinkling' brought only confirmed that the C of E was a sad and unsaved bunch.

So there I was.

I was convinced that there was a need for a personal faith and a personal Saviour. John 3:16 meant accepting the ticket to heaven from Jesus' hand - faith alone in the God made man, Jesus - man who was God!

The Bible (reading and learning it), prayer and searching out sinful acts in our own lives were the norm', not merely the acts of some sort of spiritual lunatic or zealot.

I knew that there were three sorts of sexual activity: Marriage, fornication and adultery. I also knew that only one was permitted if I was to be a Christian.

I knew that divorce was one of the 'unforgivable sins' and that to engage in one and dare to remarry made one an adulterer.

Christians needed to adhere to what had been taught within the ranks of an orthodox faith, anything outside of this was to render oneself apostate (we didn't use this word of course!0.

I had been taught that we should listen to the Holy Spirit and this was where all the piles of things I held as 'right' started to shift a bit. What was going on when what the Spirit led us to contradict what the Word instructed and even went against what might be considered to be the orthodox position?

At that time, having completed theological studies in an extremely sound establishment, I began to ask the question 'why'? In fact, I asked the question perhaps a little too often and it was during this time I felt God lead me into the Anglican heresy and came under the instructions of a man by the name of John Barter. This man showed me how sacramental, charismatic, orthodox and even reformed all came together in an Anglican setting. How Word and sacrament, Spirit and theology, charismatic and Spirit-filled all passed through the same point - and this point was Anglican!

And then came the word that shook me out of my tree . . . . .