Truth Detecting Camera

Technology and the way that it is reported is a great source of entertainment and always has been I guess since the days of that superb, and much lamented, BBC programme 'Tomorrow's World'. The problem is that much of what is reported and the way that it is done often leaves me rolling in the aisles and the news item on the 'truth camera' yesterday was a real rib-tickler.

Apparently scientists have perfected a camera which can detect whether or not the subject is lying. This technological breakthrough is based upon the heat image of the subject, but let's let the BBC tell us more in their own words:

"A sophisticated new camera system can detect lies just by watching our faces as we talk, experts say. The computerized system uses a simple video camera, a high-resolution thermal imaging sensor and a suite of algorithms. ... It successfully discriminates between truth and lies in about two-thirds of cases, said lead researcher Professor Hassan Ugail from Bradford University. ... We give our emotions away in our eye movements, dilated pupils, biting or pressing together our lips, wrinkling our noses, breathing heavily, swallowing, blinking and facial asymmetry. And these are just the visible signs seen by the camera. Even swelling blood vessels around our eyes betray us, and the thermal sensor spots them too."

So effective is this new camera that it is expected to be installed in airports and other places where would be terrorists gather. Let's hope they've factored in for consumate blushers, PMT 'hot flushers' (a very interesting 'woman's hour' on that a few years back) and make-up wearers. The reporter waxed lyrical about the advances and how the days of being able to lie were numbered - that's surely a worry for many in politics, the press and the Church!

Hopefully this will also herald more investigation into phrenology (or better still, physiognomy - I know a few people with eyes too close together and suspiciously large noses!).

So better start practising or else you'll be found out - science, and big brother, are watching:

Pax

Lollipop People

This morning, taking the youngest to school, reaching a junction which flows freely on the main road until the lights change in our favour. The lights go red for us and the main road traffic starts again and flows very nicely. Our lights go green and one car gets round before the lights change again until the process is repeated, many, many, many times.

Confused I get to the junction and realise that the lollipop person is stopping the traffic in sync' with the main road traffic lights thus preventing the traffic joining the main road from feeding more than one car per change onto it!

Get to the little village where school is and decide to take pretty route back down country lanes. Entering town, with no other cars in sight, another lollipop person (a troll-like creation in a yellow jacket hereafter know as 'lollytroll') has to run to get in front of me so they can let one child cross. They have to wait for about five seconds before the child has even made the grass that edges the road and the whole process takes about twelve seconds from beginning to end. Then, having crossed the child, lollytroll stops and waits for a woman who has appeared from the alleyway, and as she joins lollytroll they beging to chat as they cross.

Don't the council (or whoever it is that licences these vexations to the spirit) ever think of teaching them about traffic flow, looking at what cars are approaching (during the time I was stopped, I was the only car on my side of the road and the oncoming traffic was about five seconds away when lollytroll got out of the road!!!) and balancing the needs of crossing with the needs to keep the traffic (and perhaps stress) levels down as well?

I have watched lollytroll on a number of occasions. It has a habit of crossing one child, then returning and crossing another immediately after the first, sometimes with the passage of but one car before repeating the process. Walking past a while back, I asked why they didn't 'gather' a few kids and take them across so that there were a few kids crossed with but one stop. The response was that they didn't want them waiting in case they decided to run across without them!

As a supporter of assisted crossings I found this morning funny in that I hadn't realised that they were perhaps as much of a pain as others I know have claimed. Guess I don't usually do the journey so haven't noticed (or was I just fortunate to see two poor examples this morning and they were having an off day?_.

Hey Ho!