More language abuse

Apparently RBS' Stephen Hester and his bonus is 'A important issue' in the minds of the British public. Yes indeed, it is 'A issue' that needs to be addressed!

Gosh - whatever happened to the rule that words that began with a consonant being preceded by 'A' whilst those beginning with a vowel find themselves following 'AN'. Simple stuff isn't it?

Of course we have exceptions, wouldn't be a rule without exceptions, would it? A unit of something or other, A university, an honour and so on. The wonderful combination of consonant and vowel plays a great part in confusing some (all?) sometimes but I recall the words of our English master (Moonbeam) and his exhortations to us that we, Say the words and listen. Does it sound right? If it doesn't, it isn't!)

I was told(by a supposed teacher of English, but having read their letters home I have to say that I very much doubt that this is a true description!) that 'these days' pupils can select what precedes a word on the basis of comfort and regional preference. Then again this person also uses the word 'color' (which is sule a co-lor, so what's a 'lor'?) and other abominations before, and unto the, GOD* and tells me that slowly the two languages (i.e. English and American) are coalescing such that one day we can all have an coffee and donut and it won't be a unique experience!

Looks like I'm becoming a grumpy old fart when it comes to English and though this might indeed be true, I will reman AN old fart and will have CDs (not CD's) and it will not be AN issue!

Aaaargh

If you struggle with apostrophes, have a listen to this (but be careful -it's loud.

*GOD - Greater Oxford Dictionary

Predictive Text and Language Abuse

BBC's Phil Dawkes raised me from my slumbers with his report of a goal to Everton in their battle against ten-man Chelsea. What stirred me wasn't the football but the confused use of the English language. Here's the offending piece:

"Everton goal: Just when it was looking like Everton we're heading out of the Carling Cup, Louis Saha drags them back in. Seamus Coleman's cross is headed in at the near post by the Frenchman and Goodison erupts. We could well be looking at an extra half hour here."

The 'were' and 'we're' confusion seems to be more and more prevalent and it beggars the question, "Is this predictive text (PT) at it's worst?"

Perhaps the Phil is sitting, adding content on his iPad, and in the frenzy of the game misses (just like me at times) the failings of PT. Either way - early night postponed :)

Just for fun, if you have PT have a go at entering a few random keystrokes and see what you get. Here's my message to the world:

Gumshoe Rhein wickets

Hot nightie

Wordification of the UK

I was appalled at the person who wittered on about the 'pornification' of the UK with the opening of a new Bunny club in London's Park Lane. Now as much as I'm not into Bunnys (although I think those one of our Wardens had are cute) I think the language abuse the woman railing against them exhibited was more concern-making!

Not since I struggled with the moronic language abuse that was 'gayification' have I been so appalled. Why, oh why, do people feel that they can take such liberties with our language, especially when they're British? After all, even though I don't like it, I do understand that Americans, not having English as their first language, feel they have the right to be creatively grammatically (and etymologically and linguistically) wrong as part of their culture (think that's the right word).

Wasn't my 'funnest' experience, that's for sure!

Pax