Dear Santa - this year I'd like (4): The Car

Ever been frustrated as the traffic builds up and that home Communion appointment gets delayed more and more? Roadworks on the way to the Crematorium causing stress?

This is the car to end all that - time for the clergy to get out there and get on the bell with this little beauty. Not only is it fast, it has class and even if the cleric isn't a head turner, the car certainly is.

make this standard issue and watch the vocations soar as petrol heads and poseurs alike beat their way to the Vicar's door to offer to take the Queen's shilling and get collared.

Having been asked whether it comes is a 'Vicar on call' sticker - the answer is that it comes with a great Old Testament warning:

Dear Santa - this year I'd like (4): THE Pulpit

This is something many have wished they could have in their place of worship: THE Pulpit!

We've all been there I'm sure; that moment when you're in full swing and the Bible reference or the killer quote that would wow the congregation and leave you looking like you've actually prepared slips away from you.

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That's no longer a problem for at the touch of a button and touchscreen and that quote, or any other reference, fact or even joke, is there on the screen as you seamlessly switch from sermon to Bible to quotes and more. No longer do the prayers need to bumble around for the news can be there and the prayers are up to the minutes - you can even get sport channels (optional upgrade) and more. Internet, Freeview, satellite and more are all available at the touch of a button!

And for those people you know are asleep or playing '2048' during the sermon - now they're banged to rights as you zoom in with the crowd cam. Great for those little nudges during the sermon as you look almost into their should and heap condemnation upon them.

Order yours today - you know you want one!