Church: A place of safety

An increasing problem in Church, it seems to me, is not that of personal sin but the fact that leaders are increasingly encouraging their members that they are 'somewhere safe' with regard to their faith when it is obvious that many are very far from being safe!

I challenged a colleague over this and was told, "The members don't want to be told they're wrong all the time, do they?" And of course they don't but they should surely expect, and welcome, gentle correction, shouldn't they? Anything else is merely leaving people to their own devices. My colleague, with typical humour (or was it resignation?), told me that there were, "Many Christians who welcomed their errors and shortcomings being pointed out and worked on by the Vicar. The problem is that none of them come to this church!" Wherein lies the problem!

Another minister I know views Thomas (the doubter) as the, 'Cancer that destroys the Church!' When it comes to doubt or areas of unbelief they are animated and rather vocal in calling upon members to believe because anything else is the path to separation from God and the demise of the Church. "Put aside your doubts and live in freedom," was their mantra. But is is true? It is odd that this same person also tells people they are' safe' because they come to church and 'do stuff'. 'Safe' is indeed a moveable, and variable, feast!

If I tell people that they are safe and that all is well then I'm sure this will leave them happy and will mean that they live in the peace (at all levels) that those words bring. But if it is a false peace then what I am doing is sowing seeds that, when the harvest comes, will bring a healthy crop of weeds. Worse still is that if I am telling people that all is well when perhaps it isn't the issues that need to be addressed and remedied will remain untouched and I have perhaps condemned them (and surely condemned myself by my complicity) to live in sinful situations.

We are called to carry each other's load (Galatians 6.2), to restore those 'caught in sin' (Galatians 6.1) and to let our 'Yes be Yes and our No be No' (Matthew 5.37) and this means that we provide a place of honesty and love. The problem is that we live in a world where people, thinking they're being 'kind', offer what they think is supportive and kind words when, instead, God calls us to tell the truth in love (Ephesians 4.15).

Church should be a place of safety but for it to be this we need to make it a place of loving honesty and openness; something I have in times past been guilty of not always doing choosing 'peace' and 'keeping members' rather than bringing loving correction.

Now I am very aware that this is not the easiest of areas to discuss because those outside the Church will see hypocrisy (when it's merely being human) and those inside the Church will . . .

Will what?

Cry out to be told they're doing it wrong, or at least could do it better?

Move somewhere else if you point out, however gently, that they are in error?

Welcome an honest leader trying to fulfil their role with integrity and love?


You tell me - and tell me how you would like to have it as a member and as a minister.

Inclusive not permissive
Loving not condoning
Seeing not ignoring

Pax

Sticks and Stones hurt: Words condemn and deny!

It's sad that the source of much of the cruelest 'anti Christian' utterances I encounter comes from the lips of those who consider themselves to be Christian!

You probably know those of whom I speak - they live alongside you, probably wearing a fish badge, cross or some other Christian symbol (and a fish on the car too).

The problem lies in that what they say isn't Christian (even though it might sound it) and the fruit of their finger-pointing condemnation is the wounding of people and the very denial of what Christianity is about.
They mean well (so did Hitler, as my Dad used to say!) and are often repeating what they hear from the pulpits in their 'heaven assured' gatherings.

Sadly (or is that thankfully?) wrong opinions are not restricted to 'Christians' as some experiences over the past week shows for:

I heard someone talking about how Eastern Europeans are the new 'people of colour' (not quite how they said it!) and they seemed offended that I was offended by that view!

I found those who mastered in the fine art of the ad hominem - the ability to tear down and discount others because they live in the wrong place (physically and spiritually) were unemployed, addicted, marginalised and the like.

I heard those who claim to be Christian proclaiming that '_____________' [insert issue] was THE defining sin!

Having defined the 'one true defining sin' they droned on about how God would whip the sinners behindsides and how they (the sinners) were going to burn in hell (have to define who 'they' is because I'm not so sure who the burnees are going to be).

Here's my thesis statement*:

'Jesus came into the world to save sinners+.'

These words, from 1 Timothy 1.15, sit well with so many of those who like to proclaim God's mercy towards a fallen and sinful world. What makes it better is that the words come from Paul (so they must be right)!

Betterer still is that the words are, as Paul tells us, 'trustworthy' and ought to be made our own. Add to this thinking the words of John 3.16 (which explicitly states that Jesus came not to condemn but redeem sinners) and we have guidance in the way that we (as Christians) deal with, and relate to, those who are caught in sin (and aren't we all?)!

For those us you who like to point at 'sinners'. What we should be saying is:

 'These are the very people Jesus came into the world to save and reconcile to God - not condemn!'

(please note - this does not make us 'permissive' - inclusive and loving Church is not permissive)

I'm assuming we don't want to deny salvation to them and go against the Boss, do we?  So here's what we do when we see 'sinners' - It's a great piece of Pauline teaching (don't get excited - nothing to do with women's ministry):

When we see someone sinning, we:

i. Check our own life (Matt 7 helps a bit here too in limiting hypocrisy with regard to judging).

ii. Make sure we know what the sin is and understand why the person is doing it and try to understand them (and form a relationship if we can).

iii. Find out what the Bible says about 'the sin' and when we understand that we're equipped to dialogue with them biblically.

iv. GENTLY! Don't rush in waving our Bible and condemning people - remember that righteous anger is merely anger packaged up to make us appear holy when often we are not!

v. Look to restore them - not condemn (or make yourself look right) - and reconcile them to God.

vi. Continuously examine ourselves - our motives, actions and the sinful person we are to ensure that opportunities for a wrong mindset are minimised and the potential for a Christlike heart and maximised.

vii. Lead the 'sinners' to a place where engagement and dialogue can be enacted and change and learning (them and us) can take place.

So give it a go: Get it right and we'll bring others into a relationship with God. Do it wrongly and we invite the condemnation of the Church (and of Christ) because of our cruel and self-righteous hypocrisy.

Happy Friday Folks


* Yes, you were right all those years ago William, it is the opening statement!
+ 'Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners . . .'