Language abuse - the unforgivable sin?

I was brought up in a home where it was taken for granted that, as Churchill was reported (by my Dad!) to have said, "Americans and British are people separated only by a common language". The result of this is the reality that I have for many years endured the word abuse and grammatical nightmares enacted upon us as continuing retribution for the ills of George (the Monarch)! As if it wasn't bad enough trying to make tea with cold water. (is it any wonder they dressed up as native Indians (they were red when I was a lad!), what an embarrassing gaffe, should have warmed the water first!)

I find myself living in a home where americanisms abound thanks to the myriad mass of naff American programmes on the television bringing the moronic shows that our children sterilise their grey matter with. To make it worse I find myself living in a society where the influence of our 'friends' can be found even on Radio Four (R4), that great bastion of all that is right with britain. Recently, R4 interviewed a member of the Tate Modern regarding an exhibition she was working on. I was appalled to hear this obviously intelligent and supposed learned young woman speak about the the exhibition as the 'funnest' she had worked on to date. In another interview, one of our own government ministers spoke about the governments policies working for the betterification of the justice system (did she mean the betterment of the judicial system I mused punching the Winnie the Pooh of the kids had kindly left for me?)

The general rule is that although some words have been and are abused by our American cousins (remember, the only culture they have is agriculture!) there is the reality that some words can, in proper English, be in possession of the 'z' rather than the 's'. To see this we really need to be consulting our GOD - the only and ultimate authority upon the English word at the end of the day! (Greater Oxford Dictionary). Get a copy of Fowler's and keep it next to your GOD.

The fact is that these days we use 'multi' or 'international' English which results in the bastardised and confused language our kids use. This, coupled of course with the myriad number of crap US shows and films that addle our kids brains and get them asking to go to the movies rather than the cinema and needing the bathroom when the only need a toilet (and that's the easy to cope with tip of the iceberg).

Then, just when you don't think it can get any worse, they stuff the grammar, adding, exchanging and removing letters from words willy nilly - they introduce silly words like (yes, you've guessed) 'Gayification' when what they are trying to refer to is the promotion of homosexual lifestyle as an acceptable and attractive option. It's called 'proselytising', marketing, persuasion, whatever word describes the act (doing words children, doing words - follow me mo, amas, amat, amamus . . . oh no, timeslip, where my homework book? ). PH sounds like 'f' so leave it alone (and the 'u' that goes with 'o' in words like 'labour' or 'colour').

How do we protect our linguistic heritage? Learn paradigms, gain a vocablary, vocabularry, err - list of words and keep English pure as GOD intended!

Long live the People's Grammatical Front.

Pax,

V

A postscript. Don't forget the apostrophe!
It is not CD's it's CDs! The CD, regardless of how many there are, is not in possession of anything! Carry a Sharpie and add the apostrophe where it is found to be missing! Plurals do not require the addition of an apostrophe - well not in 'proper' English anyway.