Bad language

Recently I was appalled when someone introduced the term 'gayification' (the act of making 'gay' where of course it doesn't refer to lambs gambolling but other things - a further deviation of our ennobled language at the hands of the colonials). I found myself happier with people adopting a homosexual lifestyle than I was at those who corrupted the English language to produce such abominations before Fowler. I consulted my GOD (Greater Oxford Dictionary) and found that this was a pagan creation, much like Asherah poles or effigies of one of the many Baals.

Not only that but our proud British Broadcasting Corporation (Radio Five to be exact) proudly announced that our 'summarizer' for the match was to be . . . ! Our what? I am sure they meant 'Commentator' for the man was providing the 'in match' commentary and if there was to be a summing up at the end, the person doing it would be providing 'final analysis' or 'summing up' not being a 'summarizer'.

It get's worse. A curator at the Tate told listeners to Radio Four that the exhibition of art she was planning was the 'funnest' job she had had to date. considering she's supposed to be somewhat educated (it's not science but there still has to be some joined up writing somewhere I assume) I didn't understan this utterance at all. But, having enquired I find this is merely 'American'. That strange language where, in an Alice in Wonderland like style, words can mean whatever one wishes. A fact that would account for the bloke on the late news who was Facebook's head of 'Monetization' - which if you're like me is a little confusing, means 'Revenue Generation'.

Things, as I understand it have 'an impact upon other things' - they do not 'impact upon' . Well, they never used to when I was a schoolboy but now it seems they do. A local school has told its pupils that color is a correct spelling and I understand that we now wish each other 'Happy Holidays' and blithely tells people that 'We're sorry for their loss'. Seems we've stopped communicating and merely taken to use words to fill the void!

And whilst you're out there to day might I suggest you have a go at 'Friending'. It's time to drop 'Friend' as a noun and to cease using 'befriend' as a verb. Get out there and friend someone new today or better still, make yourself available and hope to hear those wonderful words, "I've friended you!" today.

May the Lord 'friend you' today and make you a partaker of His immensification (see I can learnify).