We're not in crisis here!

Just had a telephone call from a reporter asking for my views as an Anglican dog-collar on the fact that the 'Church of England is in crisis'.

I think I may have been a bit disappointing as, holding my telescope to my blind eye, I asked what the crisis was and whether my name was mentioned anywhere explicitly in the paperwork (always good to check). Apparently I'm still in the clear! Seems the crisis is a mass defection from the Anglicans to the Roman Catholics (don't know whether the 'mass'bit was supposed to be a pun!).

Further discussion came down to the fact that two bishops (Richborough and Ebbsfleet) are resigning, one (Fulham) is waiting until he retires (see Hello John, got a new denomination) to swim and two more, already retired, are also going across. The only 'mass' I see here is according to the Roman rite and I see little in terms of exodus (even if the five hundred clergy and congregation members materialises).

Having managed to garner nothing controversial or in the slightest bit exciting (steady on, I am an Anglican!) I was then asked if I thought many churches would leave, 'lock, stock and barrel' for Rome. But again I proved to be eminently boring in that whilst some churches (meaning the people) might consider 'going to Rome' they'd go without the inanimate contents of the building. Obviously not sensational stuff, we tried once more . . .

"Do you think that this is the end of the Church of England as a 'catholic' reality?" Now here we'd struck oil as I asked which 'catholic' was being used. "Universal 'catholic' or Catholic as a brand," I asked. "What's the difference," came the well-informed reply.

So I explained that 'catholic' was the Church universal and 'Catholic' was the trademark of Rome plc. After a few seconds (what I assume was( thinking, back came the response, "Err, both!"

So it began, "Well, we've not been 'Catholic' since about 1530 something and the Act of Supremacy, but we are a 'reformed and catholic' church which means we share creeds, formularies and the like. Of course, whether or not we can claim this a few years hence is another thing as the very people who claim to love the church (of England) and endorse the catholic bits of it are apparently leaving. If they go, who will stand for it (catholicity) and who will seek to keep it's integrity and maintain its practice and theology?" Seems that perhaps we have a self-fulfilling prophetic body!

By now the poor dear was obviously wishing they were reporting on a cake or flower-arranging competition out in a rural village and was getting confused more confused. After all, "Why were they in the Church of England anyway? Shouldn't they have gone back to Rome when Henry took over? Not only that but shouldn't 'catholics' be in the Catholic church, it was wrong to keep them in the Church of England!"

You know, perhaps we are in crisis, perhaps not in the church (or the Church) but most definitely in the way we teach, educate, train or whatever it is schools do these days. Perhaps we should call Catholic - Roman Catholic and catholic - universal, it might save time when reporters come a calling!