Anglican Nursery Rhymes

This all began this morning when  Jeremy Clack decided to start a Twitter thread on #anglicannurseryrhymes and during the day my brain has just gone bonkers with them. So back behind desk (tea near to hand) and here's a quick splurge:

Oh dear, what can the matter be?
Oh dear, what can the matter be?
English Heritage say 'no' to a lavatory.
The old folk drink gallons of weak church tea;
then they all squirm on their chairs.


The numbers in the Church go down and down.
The numbers in the church goes down and down,
down and down, down and down,
The numbers in the church goes down and down,
down and down, down and down,
all year long.

The Archdeacon in his office says;  "where's the share,
where's the share, where's the share."
The Archdeacon in his office says; "where's the share,
where's the share, where's the share,"
The money's almost gone!

The bishop in his palace cries, "Generosity,
generosity, generosity."
The bishop in his palace cries, "Generosity,
generosity, generosity."
It's all about souls!

The members of the council say: "Not my job,
not my job, not my job."

The members of the council say: "Not my job,
not my job, not my job."
We just have ideas!


Mary, Mary, quite contrary.
Mary, Mary, quite contrary,
Why do you volunteer?
You moan and groan,
Yet, when work's to be done,
You always disappear?


Here's the church, and here's the steeple.
Here's the church,
And here's the steeple
Open the door . .
Where's all the people?
Here's the parson going upstairs,
Is it any wonder he's saying his prayers?


Got any more (I know I have) :-)