Be sure they really understand!

Talking to a friend after this morning's service and we were talking about the fact that we (the family) meandered into a wood full of extremely angry hornets. One of our girls was getting covered in the nasty things and beginning to panic so I rushed down the path to her and started clearing them off. Realising that this wasn't the place to be we bugged out (sic!) and in the process I received about seven really big stings and another five which were less painful!

So, one of the church members suggested that I apply vinegar to the stings and another suggested something else, which I hadn't heard of, and this took me back to a situation a few years back when I was working in the City of London (scene shimmers) . . .

Having arrived at work, one of the staff members advised me to keep a wide berth of one of the young ladies because she appeared to be a 'bit grumpy'. Well, I soon realised that the 'bit grumpy' was on a par with the Titanic being a 'problem with a boat'. She was foul and as the temperature rose so did her temper and by lunchtime I decided that, being a Christian, I should take her aside and see what the problem was.

After a bit of a conversation I asked her why she was being so irritable and offer my services if I could help. "Well, you're a Christian aren't you?" she asked, "So if I tell you will you promise not to tell anyone else here?" I quickly affirmed the Christian bit and promised not to tell anyone at work what the problem was, and so she told me.

Actually I rather wished she hadn't when she had because it transpired that she what sounded very much like that wonderful yeast infection, Thrush. Having heard something on the radio about it (think it was Woman's Hour - still a good listen to and from the crem' even today) I explained that the solution was readily to hand - all she had to do was pop over to the shops and buy a live yoghurt and, a la Henry Cooper, "slap it on all over" for a few days and (to quote my mate Dave), "The job's a good'un!" With that I left, assuming that I had done my good Samaritan bit for the day.

The next day I came in and apparently our heroine was in an even fouler mood and not only that, but she was apparently after my blood too! Confused I popped over to where she was usually to be found and immediately came under a broadside of abuse! Eventually, when it had subsided a little, I asked how the problem was and she said it was no better thanks to me 'taking the mickey' (although I recall perhaps stronger words were used here) and to make matters even worse the raspberry pips were 'playing havoc with her 'sore bits' (my paraphrase of something I'm too polite to record accurately!).

It didn't take long to ascertain that a raspberry yoghurt purchased from Benjy's next door hadn't been a great deal of help and that she hadn't understood what I meant by 'live yoghurt'. I rushed down to a friendly fine food seller along the road in Leadenhall Market and purchased a large tub of the required substance. Having taken it to her I suggested that she applied some ASAP and kept the remaining stuff labelled in the 'fridge as hers for use over the rest of the week (mind you, I've just realised that there was quite a bit of moaning about people using other people's stuff - let's hope her yoghurt never got helped to!!).

Bottom (or very near it) line is that once I had explained properly and made sure that I knew the person had understood, the problem was solved. This is a lesson I thing we all need because sometimes the pip that come from miscommunication can indeed be troublesome and even when the object of our advice applies it (they think) properly, we might find things actually get a whole lot worse!

So there we are, lesson, anecdote and medical tip in one post - economic or what?

Pax