Size matters

The Vicar up the road rang to say they had to go away,
a conference for 'Large Churches' - be gone for just four days.
So I smiled and said, "How nice, well done, have fun,' then made a cup of tea!

A few days passed and the 'phone it rang again, another Vicar ringing, it quite did in my brain.
They were off to a conference, this time by the sea,
for leaders of smaller churches they were called 'midi'!
Again I smiled and said, "Well done, it's well deserved I'm sure,"
then went and had a glass of Scotch,

then had a couple more!

Another call,
a conference for 'inbetweener' church,
it made me feel quite glum, quite knocked me off my perch!
I should have just been happy, but instead it make ill as they said, "We'll talk about how to make church bigger - Justin's going to be there too and we'll share an evening meal!'

Again I said, "Well done my friend you'll soon be at full throttle,"

then found the Regimental Port and downed the blessed bottle!

Today the 'phone it rang again, at last it was for me, an invite to a conference but it wasn't by the sea,
nor staying in a hotel or some other quite plush place, it wasn't going to take a week it didn't need much space. A day for churches that were 'small' put a smile upon my face
until I asked, "Where will it be?"
Back came the flaming answer:

 "Can we hold it at your place?'

Churchastrain

I struggle with many of the Christians who tell me how we do too much and boast that this their primary message from the pulpit and on the streets is : The Church needs to stop doing and 'Just Be'!" Now accepting that this is a mantra I have used myself I have to ask why does it cause such me such angst?

A conversation regarding this led me to realise that for many of us in Church the most apt analogy is that where the gathering of Christians is portrayed as a train, and here's my reasoning:

The locomotive is full of people with energy, vision, enthusiasm and commitment. It doesn't matter how long they've been Christian or how long they've been in the church or eve how old they are, these are the drivers, doers, movers and shakers. They have a head of steam and are keen to keep themselves and the church on the rails.

Behind them is the ministry team - those people who are keen to enable, equip and release those moving the train forward; fuelling, watering, maintaining and repairing wheresoever the need might arise.

Then come the carriages, each bearing the good names like 'just be' and 'family commitments' and (full of)  'good intentions' and once they are coupled to the tender, the train is ready to leave the station - with nothing to slow it's steady (also known as 'snail's pace') progress towards growing the kingdom.

Well nothing except perhaps the endeavours of the stalwart members (also know as 'stalewart' in some circles) who populate the brake van at the rear of the train whose job, as I'm sure many will already know, is to apply the brakes should the whole caboose start to run too quickly. This is done effectively in so many instances by the application of the mantras of 'tried that before, it didn't work' and 'we're not THAT sort of church' and the like.

When I was in my sending church I had a family and was a member of a church and there was little conflict between the two. We went to church and lived our lives as a family and the two aspects of our life rarely collided. If we went away for the weekend we did it in such a way that we had Friday and Saturday and managed it so that, as much as possible we were back for the Sunday service. After all, Sundays are usually taken up with getting up and having something to eat and then heading home so what did we miss by leaving early on a Sunday or late on a Saturday?

We balanced and managed our lives so that the two important things worked together and we were blessed by it (and I hope family and church were too) and so were not confined to the 'family' coach but were free to get on the footplate.

The 'Good Intentions' carriage is another struggle; for we all fall foul of this minefield. We all want to be useful and to be an active members (we do, don't we?) - but the problem is that we don't put the stuff in our diaries or perhaps we really mean to be somewhere but then the lure of friends and getting together or visiting a pub or doing any one of a million other things that crop up just get in the way. The problem is that this is the active outworking of the passage where the Bible tells us that where our treasure is, that's where our heart is to be found. If we are really engaged and committed then we will move heaven and earth, put off the distractions and get onboard with Church. It's like having friends who never come round (or perhaps never invite you to their homes) - eventually you realise that they are friends at all - same applies to Church: You get to realise that they are acquaintances and destined to never be close (or even, to be honest) friends (at all)!

The Stalewarts at the back are a real challenge because these are really the people who, knowing the
track, should be up the front in the loco' but instead struggle to keep their church as it was when they were young (a great example being a church member who recently told me that they wished the children who visited wouldn't because , "It spoiled the service!" Ironically it is a church with almost no children in it - wonder why?). Armed with buckets of water to extinguish the flames in the firebox they criticise and carp and complain and hearken back to the old days when, "You couldn't get a seat!"

Should they find people who want to take the church in a new direction they apply the brakes and rush round making sure the points are set in the 'right' direction and then, assured that they are on a familiar track, allow the train to proceed. Even then, should things start to speed up past the point of their liking then on go the brakes again until those driving things get the message and slow down, give up or (better still) leave!

Then along come the 'Just Be' folk - the people who, as I have in the past, tell everyone that it's not about doing but just resting in the Lord. The problem with this is that my reason for telling people this is to get them to develop a relationship with God because things will come out of that whilst it seems others are content to have those around them 'being' and equally content with them not doing.

When I was first married, having a wife who didn't drive, when I came home and knew she was shopping I would take the route I knew she'd be on so that I might see her and give her a lift home. At other times, if she was somewhere and it started raining, I'd go and pick her up to save her from getting drenched. The outworking of my love was that I did things for the focus of that love. This is what 'Just Be' is all about - it fosters stuff as the outworking of the relationship.

James 2 sums it up wonderfully for us:

What good is it, dear brothers and sisters, if you say you have faith but don’t show it by your actions? Can that kind of faith save anyone?
Suppose you see a brother or sister who has no food or clothing, and you say, “Goodbye and have a good day; stay warm and eat well”- but then you don’t give that person any food or clothing.
What good does that do? So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless."

Faith produces doing and if you're not doing and yet claim to have a faith then something is wrong. Of course - just to make sure you don't get it wrong - if you go off doing stuff all the time and think this shows you be a Christian, then you've got it wrong (again) because regardless of how much you do, how much you give to the church or how many stained glass windows, pews or silver you give - you can't work or buy your way into heaven: It's all about relationship with God through Jesus, the Christ.

So some simple questions:

Are you on the train that is Church?

If you answered 'Yes': Where are you on it?
If you answered 'No' would you like to find out how you can be?


All aboard

Maintenance of true religion

Many years back, in a lecture on what it was to be 'Church', those of us who were assembled were told how we were training to, "Become a modern day shaman for those in the community in which we were to serve."

The lecturer told us how we were to discharge our duties by baptising all, and any, babies brought to us, bury their dead, marriage their love struck and be, "Guardians of the faith of the community."

What we weren't told was that it was also, by our believing, we would ensure that others could comfortably disbelieve. It is an 'odd but true' situation that when the pastor/priest/leader comes to a place of disbelief or uncertainty the whole structure and stability of the community becomes oddly unstable. It is as if by introducing an element of disbelief that the disbelief felt by others is made less real - and that's a real odd un, innit?

That we might suspect something does not exist or function as we thought is something that we all, at times, have in our own realities. But tell us that we might be right and rather than celebrate and engage in this unbelief the result is rather a confusion with parallels in the unresolved grief such as we saw with Princess Diana. It's great for us to have doubts but when those who are supposed to not have doubts on our behalf do so, then we don't have the wherewithal to withstand it! Worse still, we have to believe what is being unbelieved to compensate for the unbelief of the professional believer.

To compound the situation the belief of others brings the freedom to disbelieve or doubt and as long at they (the priest/pastor/leader) keep up the role then we are free to harbour disbelief. When meaningless is delivered to our door we have to 'man up' and make sense of the emptiness that is a reality for some who profess a Christian faith.

This poses a real challenge for us in ministry because merely 'doing our job' and faithfully believing in a community means that we are there for the delivery and maintenance of folk religion - baptise my baby so it will be lucky (a real quote) - and by maintaining a place of faith endorse a people of no faith! This means, if we are to make faith real, that we must be taking the faith out and be engaging with the people around us.

I engage with many people who speak fondly of the central church building in our town, referring to it as 'their church' and recalling weddings and other occasional offices that confirm this as a reality. If we were to say it was going to close there would be uproar and yet try to get the people to come in to a service and you'd think they'd been asked to run naked through the town. Oddly, some would be more keen to do that than attend a service! All of which means that we need people to be educated as to what Church is all about.

We need to meet with and engage with people to help them see the difference, and the similarity, found in people when they take upon themselves the label 'Christian'.

We need to have a church populated by people who understand their faith and have the ability to share it - which means sound teaching and intelligent leadership - inside the building, outside in the parish and when (and wherever) they are asked to give an answer for the hope that they have in Jesus.

We need those in leadership to be continually engaged in developing their own faith and to dialogue and grow in it so that their personal Christian walk is vibrant and lively; the steadfast and engaged faith, coupled with a desire (and ability) to share is the key to growth and a mature (and lively) congregation.

Or we can remain faithful and within our own walls waiting for 'them to come in' and maintain the folk religion of the masses around us.

Church: Thinking about structures

As a missioner (of sorts) and one of the biggest issues I come across has nothing to do with the Gospel or evangelism or even 'paying the share' but has to do with the size and structure of a church.

So many people want large churches but fail to realise that this means the end to being a 'family' church.  When I say this the listener throws up their hands and starts explaining how they want families and how families are oh so important. So I have to explain that somewhere around the forty to fifty member mark the church runs like a family - often, but not always, with the minister are the father (but always invariably the primus inter pares*) and above this we find more pastoral support structures which evolve into programmes and stratification before eventually giving way to a corporate structure (which I'm increasingly seeing relabelled as a 'modern minister' model).

Church and management are words that should go together but the problem is that they seem to mix like Guinness and Lemonade (if you fancy a bit of fun ask for a Guinness shandy some time - two drinks in one!).

Many of those who are spiritual eschew structures and anything that sounds like management whilst some I meet have well organised and well-oiled machines running like clockwork but without love, joy, peace and all the other fruit and traits that speak of Jesus and new life. But there is a balance and this is one of the rarest things to behold and yet a joy when we do. I know because I've seen it (but just don't seem to be able to make it mine!).


When talking to one dogcollar recently I was amazed at the passion they had for their sub-fifty church to become a 'large church'. They were longing for the day when they might become a 'midi' church and continue on to the diadema that is a 'larger churches day' at the cathedral. I have to say that having been at them the journey would definitely be better than the arriving but hey ho, you've got to have a dream and talk about the things you'd like to do. After all as hymn 999 in hymns Ancient and Ancienter so rightly continues: 'You gotta have a dream, if you don't have a dream, how you gonna have a dream come true?'

The problem is that I see people organising church out of existence (and yet we really do need structures, organisation and processes - accountability, lines of support (and management)  and job descriptions and the like). The problem is I do see churches where there's so much dissipation and chaos that any talk of a God of order is taking the mickey. Letting the lunatics run the asylum is not delegation and the Stalinist approach to church management only fuels transfer growth (at best) and the end of church-going (at it's worst).

One of the greatest aids to growth is a mixed-mode, mixed-economy Church. One where Emerging church emerges and lives alongside Fresh Expresssions and traditional church models and all live in harmony. One where churches send their members out to 'make Christ known' and do this as the end in itself, not as press gangs who will bring back impressed church members to the mother ship.

So, following on from some troubles conversations and some querulous folk who are exploring what it means to be leading church and are confused by what they see in the place they belong, I thought I might intersperse the baptism dialogue (which will continue at a pace at which other might keep up and perhaps take the lead) with some thinking about collaboration and delegation and how it is neither 'do what you want' or 'do what I tell you to' but us reasoning together and walking in step with our eyes on the cross and our hands joined in fellowship and common purpose.

* First amongst equals

All Member Ministry - Spinning Plates

Back from holiday, picking up the pieces and looking towards the second half of 2013 I find myself, once again, faced with so many opportunities that it makes my head spin! There's Tamworth Street Angels, the Mission Shaped Ministry Course, Schools ministry and more besides.

There are so many opportunities in the community we serve and for a small church we are blessed to have some wonderfully committed and engaged members, not that this means all the bases are covered but we do have a high proportion of people doing stuff (and that's a real blessing). and have a few slowly progressing along the path to lay and ordained ministry too (which is a blessing and gift to the church and the wider Church too).

There's enough emails to keep me busy until Christmas and so many more requests and opportunities for us as a church to engage with that I can see there being even more plates to be added before long - guess we need to pray in more workers :-)

I've been amazed at the number of people I have engaged with over the past few weeks who have told me that they couldn't find a role in their local place of worship and have found the common element was that they were looking to be people with influence rather than people who influenced by doing. Not only that but they knew what they didn't like and what they didn't want but were less sure about what they did and all, almost to a person, was upset because they 'weren't listened to' or were basically unable to have their own way.

Interestingly it was the pastor or dogcollar that came in for the real stick because they, 'Just weren't listening to them!'

I rarely find a leader who is unwilling to listen, they just tire of listening to the same old stuff and the demands that are more often than not unaccompanied by offers of real help and engagement.

As we get nearer to the September rush into Christmas can I encourage all of us to stop, pray, read (the Bible), think and discern where and what God is calling us to do - what parts we are called to play (which might not be the same as desire to be) and having done so, let us get off our bottoms and get stuck in to the work of blessing one another, building each other up and getting the work before us done?

A sad, yet equally funny, quote regarding someone who was a 'good giver' (which some consider to be enough these days I'm afraid) who left a church went thus: 'If you lend someone a tenner and never see them again it was probably worth it!'

This is true also of those who think that their presence is justified on the basis of what they give and that should be a factor in how they are regarded by the rest of the church (and especially the leader), but this isn't the case - it's not what you give, but how you give it.

It's not what you give that counts - it's how you serve!

Add caption

How's your serve today?

When Church and world agree

I've had a most interesting conversation regarding the re-visioning of Church and the desire that Church would one day be a place of 'inclusion and acceptance' rather than a place of 'exclusion, rules and regulations'.

Of course me being me I had to say that surely what was needed (and desirable) was an inclusive Church; inclusive, not permissive, but I found that this was a different vision of the accessible and inclusive Church they had. In fact by the time they'd outlined their 'Church model of choice' I'd come to the conclusion that what they wanted sounded very much like the world and rather than reinvent the wheel all that was needed was for them to walk outside the door and enjoy themselves to their hearts desire.

Of course, saying it wasn't too popular - but let's be fair, I'm probably never going win one of those popularity contests now am I? Not only that, but as me dear old Mum used to say, 'Tell the truth and shame the devil,' so I get some Pharisee points for that and perhaps a few more for my integrity and candour (No, oh well!).

My struggle is that some have the idea that the path to a Church that is spoken of well and is 'popular'  and flourishing is for us to stop being seen as a place of negatives. If we stop 'disapproving' and start 'affirming' the result is obvious, we will have re-invented Church and this new inclusive entity will flourish.

The reason I struggle lies in the fact that the logic behind it works on the premise that the removal of those issues or elements that cause conflict or contend with societal attitudes or values results in a lack of tension and division and pave the way to popularity.

The reality, as I see it however, is different and obvious:

i. Remove the current issues and, like buses, there will be another one behind.

ii. If the ground upon which the Church stands is slowly undermined, the building upon it collapses.

iii. Many of the issues that cause conflict are concerned with behaviour and attitudes and often come back to moral behaviour and that old fashioned, and much vilified, word 'sin'.

iv. What we need is to be engaged in inculturation. To learn the language of the culture and work to make the Christian message accessible and understood - after all, Christianity isn't about 'don't' it's about 'done!'

I don't think we need to revise the Church or the Bible but rather need to rethink our apologetics and renew the passions of those who call themselves Christian; to get back to basics and early Church practices.

I don't think we are engaged enough in the issues of social justice and this is more than folly, it's disobedient too!

I don't think making Church look like the world has any great value - for 'counter-cultural' has always been the reality when describing God' people (old and new) - what has value is love, integrity and acceptance. This is what Church does best.

Of course I didn't convince my opponent :-)

Hey Ho

How to make your church grow - part one

Having this very morning opened an email asking me what I thought was needed to help their church grow I have found myself thinking seriously about how I can respond and, as I do so, I find it to be a thing of many parts. But the most important of these (for me anyway) is:

BE A DISCIPLE - NOT A MEMBER

Being a disciple means that I want to learn how to look like, act like, think like, live like, love like Jesus.

When I was an apprentice I followed people around, made tea, handed tools to whoever I was working with, washed the cups, made tea, got shouted at (a lot) and learnt my craft. As I passed through each of the training areas I followed the fitter, technician, P Way man and learnt what they did and copied them. Where they went - I went!

I found myself talking like them and becoming a composite of them all in terms of expression and thinking (technically anyway - never managed to quite master the attitudes many had over race, gender, politics and the like).

I became a product of the whole and learnt that for us to succeed (which meant do the job well and not be caught when we weren't) I had to be a part if the whole: There was just 'us' and that's who we worked for -Each Other! When a problem appeared we got stuck in and supported one another - we were a team.

Nothing has changed now I'm in the Church. I find myself sounding, acting and (I hope) thinking like the man I'm apprenticed to (in case you haven't guessed, this is Jesus) and I assume that this is the same for others too.

This is where I get disappointed because my assumptions are all too often wrong and rather than follow and look and learn and do and be, I find people who (like some of those I once worked with) are under the impression that 'being there' is enough. These are the people who clock in and out of church and work environments with the belief that attending is enough and, just like in the world of work, they are saddened as they see others pass them by.

We can change the world if we are disciples.

And as we change to look, sound and feel like the person from whom we learn we will change others too.

Where I am we have recently offered the SHAPE Course and are in the process of other training and exploration opportunities and whilst I know some will be content to merely turn up (and that's fine if that's who, where and what they are and that's the stage they're at - God is patient and kind) I know others will be keen to become disciples and, in turn disciple others, to look, act, speak, think, do and live like the Master craftsman we follow building nit in wood but in stone - living stones that are and is the Church.

So: Point the First - BE (and make) disciples

Missional - More than a word - seeing with different eyes

Looking at statistics and engaging with people, people of faith and no faith, I am increasing drawn to the desperation, despair, denial and dedication before me. The dedication and commitment of some, their tenacious acts of defiance for the hope that is Christ spur me and inspire.

The vision of hands used to working wood, of nostrils used to the aroma of wood as it is hewn or worked loom, once again, before me. How real was the despair of those around Him as His senses combine to assess, smell, caress that wood; the cross member which was to become for Him a vertical deathbed that led, Narnia-like, into a different world where death is vanquished and sin is rendered impotent and done for.

Every step proclaiming something awful to those whose eyes, whose reality, was grounded in the 'what is'; but surely there were some who gazed upon that scene and saw something full of awe?

Greater love has no man than to lay down his life . . .

Tear down this Temple and in three days . . .

It is written that the Son of Man must . . .

How hindsight informs the past and denies the present; how the present denies the past and fails to live in either the future or the past. How the future is a hope like the hope of those seeking six numbers on the Lottery - the place where all is well; all is at peace.
 
And so day-by-day, step-by-step, we - the Bride of Christ - sit in the garden of our lives waiting and watching for flowers to appear and bloom even though we have planted none - we wait hoping to benefit from the toil of others, perhaps gone. We look to God to dress the vines and tend His garden so we might be blessed.

God? Watches and waits wiling us to pick up the shovel, the rake and fork; to clear the leaves, remove the litter and pull up the weeds.

How hard it is to see the world with God's eyes; to engage with people with His heart and yet that is our call.

Faithfully some wait,  tenaciously, but 'what is faith without works' and yet 'what are our works without faith; without prayer and vision'?

I hear time and time again the words, 'those who plan to fail fail to plan!' The problem is that many who do plan fail to involve the author of all and merely set the scene for well-meaning dissipation.

So what do we do and how do we do it?

We seek the Lord and discern that which we, individually and corporately, are called to be [the dreaded 'mission statement'].

We imagine that which we will see if we are living out the mission [the equally dreaded (and dreadful) 'vision statement'] and discern the ways we can make it real.

We convert these into reality [goal setting] and get others to work with us too!

Why do we really make it all so difficult - it's as easy as picking up a piece of wood ;-)

Changing services and simple maths!

I had a very interesting conversation with someone who was crowing about the number of 'members' they had and especially about the fact that they had many 'new members' [and I smiled].

They went on (and on) to tell me about church and how 'concentrating' the services had proved good because they had more people in the 'main' service [and I smiled even more sweetly still].

Then came the punchline as they explained that the only disappointment was that 'usual' and 'average' numbers had fallen (year-on-year) and that this was confusing because of the 'other growth' [and I started asking a couple of questions].

Question One - 'Tell me about your new members?'
So they told me that this was due to the number of additional people who had appeared on the new electoral roll and how they had worked to get people in their patch to sign the forms and 'be part of the church'.

So I explained that, as I understand it, being on the electoral roll conferred the right to vote at the Annual Church Meeting (APCM/ADCM*) and thus makes them members of the Annual meeting but not necessarily 'church members' - who I would call 'communicants' (even if they don't communicate - that is take communion).

So what they had was a number of people who wanted, for many reasons, to be associated with the church. This was neither a statement of faith , attendance or even engagement for everyone I have canvassed this year tells me that attendance and numbers on the roll were very different form each other

Question Two - 'What does 'concentrating the services' mean'?
What this meant was that they had merged some services, an act that had the effect of raising the attendance for the remaining service. This is often the case that if we merge one or more services the observed effect is that the number of people attending the 'new' service will be more than the previous, unmodified service, attendance. It's common sense that if you have three services with a 'usual' headcount of twenty-five people, merging them will see the one winning some from the other two services. Of course, like efficiency, the overall percentage attendance will never equal one hundred per cent. Here's the purely mathematical equation for two services (A and B) which we will merge into one:

A+B = Total Population

Now, unless we have suddenly done something extremely marvellous (like offering free beer or a fiver for those who come to the service) the reality is that the people who come to the new service (cong) will never exceed the previous Total Population:

   (cong ÷ TP) x 100 ≯ 100%

Let's play and see whether this works:

Two morning services; the early communion (EC) and the, All-Age (AA), the average attendance of each is 15 and 23, giving a TP of 38. We merge the services to produce a 'family communion' and have a congregation (cong) size of 30. This means that we now have a service that has an relative attendance of:

(30 ÷ 38) x 100 = 79%

Our success in bringing two congregations into one, and seeing 'growth' in the new service,  represents a real loss of 21%.

So how do we deal with this, which of the options below do we take (assuming there was, of course, dialogue before the merging of services)?

a. Deciding that the new service is a better platform for growth we wish those who have left well and continue, looking to build on the 'success' of the new, and look forward to more coming along?

b. We dismiss the fact that some have left and celebrate the 'growth' without any real strategy to build on it?

c. We realise that some, perhaps stalwart (often pronounced 'stalewart'),  members have stopped coming and work on a strategy to cater for them in some way.

My problem is that the person I discussed this with was taking the middle option (that's 'b' by the way - and there is another I could have added which would have asked, 'What is acceptable loss?') and merely being happy because there was growth on the electoral roll and growth in the 'morning' service (so what was the other service, chopped liver?). There was no plans to consolidate or redeem the apparently lost - joy was to be found in the apparent and that was enough.

And this is why churches grow smaller.

Perhaps I should add that having lost the evening service some time back, this is now a one service on a Sunday church and should that one service fail, then it will be one of the most attractive carpet warehouses ever seen ;-)

*APCM - Annual Parochial Church Meeting
ADCM - Annual District Church Meeting

CofE Statistics Released

The figures are in for 2011 and, like the Curate's Egg, not all of it is bad:

Smile At:

Christmas (2011) saw a year-on-year increase of 14.5% more worshippers to our services with a grand total of 2,618,030 (and the 2012 are looking to be better still).

Baptisms also increased by 4.3% (with a rise of just over 5% in adult baptisms) bringing the combined number of baptisms for 2011 to 139,751 baptisms.

Thanksgiving Services also increased by 11.9% (that's 6,582 for the year).

Frown a little at:

Average Weekly Attendance which fell by 0.3% (which is almost static!) to 1,091,484 and leads one to smile (again) that the decline has been (nationally) arrested and smile even more that this means that many places are seeing growth to bring this about (Praise God or what?).

Smile again that:

Growth - around half of the regions are reporting growth in Church attendance, with 46% (20 out of 44 dioceses) enjoying  increases.

Young People - A 1.2% increase in children and young people attending (risen to 216,928).

Need some work with

Weddings which decreased by 3.6% (perhaps we need to look at the preparation and welcome/image and prices?) - that said, we still did 51,880.

Conversely

Wedding Blessings - have risen by 4.5% (so we must be doing something right!).

An interesting aside comes in the information that the trend over the past decade has been that the CofE married an average of 1,000 couples every week and that is pretty much maintained (but needs some real work).

Funeral  numbers have fallen slightly as in 2011 there was a year-on-year drop of 2.8% (that's still 162,526) but the ONS (Office for National Statistics) posts a fall of 1.8% death for the same period so there is some correlation  When you think that we do more than 3,000 funerals each and every week (400 a day) it is obvious that this pastoral office is a large part of the parochial mission and ministry to those around us!

Cheering news to send us all back to our kneelers methinks

Happy Tuesday

Church - Arrivals and Departures

This week I was blessed by some people who were keen to see their church grow and one of the issues that caused some pain was the comings and goings, and oddly despite the pain of caused by loss, it was the gain that brought forth challenges and questions.

'How do we get new people in? . . . How do we get them to stay?' . . . How do we get them to become disciples? . . . How we make it so they don't feel uncomfortable when we stand, sit, kneel or do other stuff? . . . what does this mean for those who want to maintain a traditional church rather than all these 'seeker friendly' things?''

And on the questions went on, and the pain, frustration, fear and feelings of pressure was obvious and, to be honest, rather challenging (for me too!). Here are a few thoughts on the question which may (or perhaps not) be helpful:

Bringing them in
One of the problems is that so many churches, congregations and fellowships have this amazing idea that people will just come in because they are there. If only this was true; but at least some of those asking the questions were under the impression that they needed 'bringing in'.

Roll up, roll us, come and see the show
Another problem is that some put on 'Seeker Services' which have the very best in preaching, welcome, music, refreshments and the like; then having hooked them (or so they think) abysmal service is restored. Do this and you'll not only lose them the next week but you will have an almost impossible task to bring them back again (once bitten - twice shy). And regardless of the 'God will bring them in' words, God might but we can chase them away too!

Keep it honest
If your services are pants then change them! If you make them attractive, efficient, enjoyable, then the current members will be happier (well I know I would have been in some churches I have been in had they done this) and what's on offer will be winsome and appealing too (just don't ditch liturgy, theology or practice to do it ;-)  ).

Getting them to stay
Simple really, make them feel at home and engaged with. If you are someone who wants choir, organ and the like then you're probably not going to stay in a heavy metal church and vv. But, if you can endure the music and the preaching and service and people are not off-putting then you're 40% of the way in! (10% knowing of the church, 10% being invited to a service, 10% for finding you liked the people and what went on another 10% and the final 10% for not feeling:
i. pressured
ii. ignored
iii. conned

How do they becomes disciples
Here's a tough one (for many) because the answer is that we become disciples and model it for the new people. The real sadness is that so many want newcomers to become what the existing members aren't (and if by some chance they do, they often get jealous of the 'zealots') without being committed themselves. Well they often are committed, but to their roles, positions, opportunities and the like - and guard them fiercely. Bring them in - work with them - encourage them - show them what being part of the body is by being it!

But we're traditional
And that's not a problem, after all, that's what the church was for years. In fact some have a problem with the worship band, happy clappy, exuberant styles and feel more comfortable with 'proper church'. That said, King James Version and too much of the Thees, Thous and God knowest stuff and you'll queer the pitch somewhat!

And we're Rad man!
Great, you can bleed the air our of our radiators (you do have a rad' key don't you?).

Seriously - bleeding edge church can be great but dumbing down, amplifying up and the like doesn't make it  relevant, and that's the key. Meeting people where they are not where you want them to be. Contemporary worship and an end to liturgy isn't the answer, because at the end of the day there's still the sacred and sacramental to be dealt with (isn't there?)

Stand, Sit, Kneel (fetch?)
Not a problem - you say, 'We stand to . . .' or, 'We sit (or kneel) to  . . .'
If you tell people what you're doing then, generally, they do it.

This is something that clergy encounter all the time when they arrive at the crematorium or church for funerals, weddings and baptisms. Even if the rest of Christendom thinks it's weird, as long as the people in service are happy and know what they are doing (why helps as well!) - crack on and enjoy relaxed and informed people.

The key to it all is for us to put ourselves in the newcomer's place and engage in some critical questioning narrative  - here's a few for starters:

How would I feel about what's happening if I were a newcomer?
Why should I come in?
Why should I come back?
How do I fit in to the place, people and stuff?
What does it all mean?
Where do I sit?
When do I do stuff (and why)?
Who's here to help me?

(Make up your own)

Making people welcome - Do we?

I'm sure we all like to think of ourselves as a welcoming church but is this really true?

One of the people who came to a colleague's church last weekend told them that they'd tried another in the area and managed, even though the congregation was relatively small (around twenty) they managed to enter, take part in the service, and leave without being greeted or in any way engaged with. Knowing the dogcollar in that church I know that they would be saddened and disturbed by such a report and yet, also knowing the church (and having heard this regarding them before), I am confident that there is some truth in it.

Every year we have a visit from a mystery worshipper (MW) and this has proved really helpful for the church in that it highlights the things that we are doing well and brings to our attention the things we are missing. 

We like to think of ourselves as a welcoming and friendly bunch and yet, on one such visit, the MW managed to enter the building and visiting the toilet first, creep in during the melee at the back where Christmas cards were being sorted out, and sit down unnoticed. And then they were greeted by the people around them and engaged with and made to feel welcome.

BUT

It shows that, because we have someone at the door in the worship area rather that at the 'front door', we can miss that first, perhaps all-important, greeting.

Other thing we have been marked down for were the street signs (kids and council issue), the bins being out front (but there's nowhere else for them to go) and the 'basic biscuits' (their words) that were on offer (Jaffa cakes last week - Lent, never heard of it . . and yes, I know Sundays are outside of Lent!).

So, back to the latest report of not being engaged with, welcomed or waved off. How on earth can we do such a thing and hope to see our congregations grow? Some might say that that's a problem with evensong, for I can believe someone crept in, did and left without engagement at a non-Eucharistic service but (always a 'but'):

I have recently heard of someone who came to a Sunday parish communion and although they were given a sheet for the service and welcomed, were not spoken to or otherwise engaged with (other than a handshake at the peace) until they left. At the end, people vanished out back or sat in groups and chatted and they, after sitting in their seat for five minutes were totally ignored! And this is in a church where numbers are falling and the billed strategy is welcome and growth. Perhaps this could explain the continued fall in numbers.

So here's a plea: Please have a think about being a welcoming church. This doesn't mean that you engage the use of the dreaded 'Welcome Team' with their cheesy and often false-feeling pinning down of any unfortunate who happens to enter the building. What I mean is that we should BE a welcoming church rather than have a welcoming team. What's the point of doing the cheesy smile and then sitting the person amongst people who are interested only in their own little clique or circle friends?

One lady who visited us came because she'd tried another church and they were just a little too welcoming. They felt like they'd been assigned an escort who stuck with them throughout the service, the after service tea/coffee/squash and a biscuit thing and even walked with her to their car. they felt pressurised and that the whole thing was false, for having been assigned a minder everyone else ignored her.

Sadly she didn't stay as she found us a bit cramped - too many people in such a small space :-(

Why don't you ask a friend to come and visit your church and report back or perhaps, like us, you have such a scheme in the diocese.

The first thing a visitor remembers is the welcome - everything else merely adds (or detracts) from the church experience.

How's your?