Just been talking to a 'Christian' who thought they might put me straight - not that they asked me whether I needed to be put straight or even had the grace to find out if I agreed with their views before they launched into their view of what Church should be.
And it goes like this (don't think she even stopped for breath):
'Church needs to stop being so sexist and stop being homophobic and stop supporting Israel and stop being so stuck in the past and should realise that marriage isn't the norm' anymore and should lock up all the paedophile priests and get rid of the Pope and stop lending money to people that can't afford to pay it back and should stop trying to make everyone feel guilty just because they are having fun and should leave Christmas alone and stop going on about God and Jesus and making everyone feel like they're doing it all wrong.
If Church just told everyone that they're doing alright and got on with helping the poor and doing what it was supposed to do then it would be more popular!'
So I asked what church they attended (thinking of praying for their pastor/minister/priest) and the response was, 'Oh, I don't go to church, I don't believe in God!'
'But you started by telling me that you were a Christian,' said I (just a little confused by now).
Her response placed the cherry on the whole pile of patisserie she had just baked for me:
'I am, I was christened!'
So I thanked her for her advice and said I'd pass it on (Justin, Ruth, Gavin - are you watching?) and left her to her campaign of world domination and the sunshine (and looked for a suitable wall to bang my head against)
And it's only ten to nine in the morning!!!!!!
ps. assume the lending bit referred to Wonga - glad Justin has stopped doing that :-)